WorkTales

I really don’t remember exactly how I learned about where babies come from but I suspect I learned some of that in school. My wife who comes from a medical family decided on a much different tack.

She bought a book about where do babies come from and gave it to my eldest who was about 5 1/2. I wasn’t asked to read the book to Timothy but it must have been read to both of the boys. David was still at the learning to speak stage so every word was a new and fun experience.

Yet, it was not always fun for me. We were out shopping for clothes one day with David in the shopping cart. Well, he decided to try out one of the new words from Timothy’s book. Sure the word was a German one but with a bit of imagination you would get the idea.

So sitting in the cart happily singing nay, just short of shouting.

VAAA GEEEE NAAA

Over and over and over …

I can be a bit of a smart alec and if you ask my wife perhaps more than that. This week I had been doing some “home office” work which I find to be a bit of an odd way of saying working remotely.

As tomorrow is good Friday, today is the last working day of the week and as well the last day of kindergarten before school break. It is customary that the last day of the week is parents breakfast and this week was a bit more that that, it was Easter breakfast.

While discussing the plans Wednesday over dinner I found out that my wife would not be there due to work issues, so I asked my son David if there would be any single mothers there. His answer was perfect.

“No. They all have children”

He didn’t notice the look that his mother gave me.

It started out with me going to the store to pickup a couple of things for dinner. While shopping I ended up getting more than I had originally planned for but hey, its food, I am sure we will eat it all. Yet I thought it would be a nice surprise to pickup a bottle of wine to go with dinner.

Although it may be acceptable to leave the children in the car for a minute during normal circumstances, the weather was extremely hot. It was in the high nineties and they didn’t deserve to sit in the heat even for a few minutes, so I brought them with.

The question came shortly after we entered the store.

Why are we here?

I said that we are quickly visiting the cooking store. This was good enough, until we got home. Mama saw us unpacking and asked what mischief we had been up to. My eldest was quick to say we went shopping and then we went to the cooking store. You could see from my wifes face that this didn’t quite register so she asked for more detail. My son who is a whiz with reading said the store was called “O’Brother Wine and Spirits”. This did answer the question for my wife, and reminded me that children may be either the best or the worst possible witnesses depending on your situation.

Well, there are a lot of people who are morning people. They just wake up and with a couple of stretches they are ready to go. Some people are responsible or consequent and go to bed early and they too have no problem getting up. The last group would be those who burn the candle at both ends and need a cup of coffee or tea in the morning.

I cannot guess what profession my children will go into but even at their young age, they can recognize a pattern when they see it. On this particular Saturday morning my eldest son suspected I would like a coffee and using logic that never grows old, if a little bit is good, then a lot must be better. So imagine my surprise when he comes trotting out a triple espresso for me. I loved the gesture, but had to explain that normally a single espresso is plenty.

Normally on Sunday mornings the children have Sunday school before the service starts and while they are doing that I try to catch up on my reading. However, as boys will be boys I do sit in their room until the teacher shows up. It is a bit easier to ensure that things don’t get out of control.

Last Sunday, I was keeping an eye on things when the choir director showed up and asked if she should start early today. The actual teacher wasn’t yet in so Martin and I agreed to quickly sing with the children. Martin was drafted into holding up large signs with the words to the song that the choir director was trying to teach the kids. It helped that both of them were singing and that this wasn’t the first time the children had heard the song.

I was however a bit puzzled. My youngest couldn’t read yet and of the children that were in this class it appeared that only about three of the nine could read. I don’t think that during her time in front of the class this fact was understood while she was there, nor later.

She is not dumb, but I guess she did have one of those “special” moments.

When I was a young boy, I helped to prove that children are practically the perfect tape recorder. I had heard an adult refer to the garbage can as the “shitcan”, so you should take that junk and just “shitcan it”.

The first time I used this term with my father probably came as quite a shock. My dad decided to take a low key approach to this situation. Rather than freaking out and making a big deal about this, he explained that in this house we call it the trash can and that language is not appropriate.

This year for Valentines day my eldest son brought me a cup of coffee in bed. He got down the cup, brewed it, added milk and brought it in. It was great, but this has been at least eight years in the making. The boys both knew how to make a cup of coffee and had done this quite a number of times over the last few years.

I have asked him periodically to make me a cup, but yesterday he balked. The problem is that he has been making me coffee quite often recently. I guess it really depends on how you count it, but I suspect it would easily fit on ten fingers over the last three weeks.

It is completely understandable not wanting to do after a lot of repetition of a given task. I can only say that he is indeed lucky that his parents didn’t feel the same way about changing diapers over the first couple of years of his life.