Where do you think you are
A couple of guys went into a somewhat grubby looking bar in the eastern Europe looking for something to drink.
Patron: Hmm, I would like to have wine.
Patron: Perhaps a nice Chardonnay
Waiter: Red or White. You have to realize just where %&$# you are.
Rules of Communism
Don’t say anything
If you do say anything don’t write it down
If write it down don’t sign it
If you sign it don’t be surprised
Wonders of Communism
Everybody had a job but nobody did anything
You could never buy anything but everybody had everything
Everybody has been stealing but nothing was ever missing
A Russian joke
Somebody comes and knocks on the door and a housewife answers. Do you need any wood? She looks over at the pile of wood and says no. The next day when she wakes up and opens the door all of the wood is gone.